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Cate Kalin, LCSW

 

The three values I live and work by…


Balance

Balance is important to all aspects of life, including in our work together.  I may ask you to consider things in a new way; encourage change in your life; challenge you to feel emotions you rather avoid, but my goal is to honor where you are at in your personal journey.  This means validating that your emotions make sense, knowing that you are doing the best you can and that no one else could do a better job living your life, and empowering you to take the lead on your journey of healing.

“A child may try to help a butterfly to emerge by breaking open its chrysalis.  Usually the butterfly doesn’t benefit from this.  Any adult knows that the butterfly can only emerge in its own time, that the process cannot be hurried.”
Kabat-Zinn, J., Ph.D. (2009). Full Catastrophe Living: using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain, and illness (15th ed.). New York, NY: Bantam Dell.

Integrity

“Courage over comfort”

We often prioritize others’ feelings of comfort over our own emotions, needs, and values.  It can feel more comfortable and safe to live our lives from a guiding principle to ‘not make any waves.’  We may smooth over conflicts to prevent rejection, deny our emotions to appease others, belie our entire selves to gain a false sense of certainty and control.  Living our lives from this conditioned and fear based perspective, we present a false impression of our true nature.  And over time, we lose our sense of self.  We may question our belonging, feel as though we’re hiding behind various masks, or feel a general sense of emptiness at our core.   It takes a commitment to courage to live our lives with the intention to be true to ourselves and recognize our inherent goodness.  When living from a place of integrity, you feel a sense of trust in yourself and in the world, a sense of freedom, and a sense of belonging or home within yourself.  I am committed to walking at your side as you learn to uncover and honor your true nature.

(2017, April 26). Retrieved February 05, 2018, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewngFnXcqao

Compassion

Too often compassion is limited to others and not the self.  We make efforts to be gentle, patient, and kind with others while we criticize and have impossible expectations for ourselves.  Many minimize their challenges and losses believing that ‘others have it worse,’ and yet comparing our lives to others does little to motivate or inspire.  All of us have felt pain in its various forms; all of us have faced loss, big and small.  We are all, at times, “astonished by the generous measure of loss that is conferred upon even the most average life.”  You are not alone.  In fact, it is something that connects us all.   I believe that in your struggles, you have shown a strength that may go unnoticed, but the perseverance you have manifested deserves to be recognized and appreciated.  My goal is to acknowledge the strength that you have shown time and time again.  I want to hold space for you to realize that strength in yourself so that you may be caring and gentle with yourself.  I want you to be truly compassionate with yourself as you are with so many others.

Whyte, D. (2015). Consolations: the solace, nourishment and underlying meaning of everyday words. Langley, WA: Many Rivers Press.